The One Quality I Wish I Had

Filed in Stress & Anxiety by on October 6, 2016 0 Comments

It seems no matter what wonderful qualities or gifts we’ve been given in life, we always want what we don’t possess—it’s just human nature. A beautiful woman wishes she were smarter. Some rich guy longs to also be famous. A brilliant scientist wishes she could be more sociable so she can meet the man of her dreams. And so on and so on.

Well, I’m no different. I’m not happy with myself either!

The one thing I wish I had is stronger emotional stability.

My wife, Elaine, is blessed with very stable emotions. I, on the other hand, seem to need to strike the perfect balance between busyness and relaxation to remain emotionally well-adjusted. My mental wellness relies on me having some projects to work on, but not too many, and none that are too daunting or open-ended. And I need to have control—God forbid someone else should dictate any of my actions! As a result, I feel like I’m constantly walking an emotional tightrope, off which I could fall at any time.

Elaine seems to be happy and content wherever she is and whatever she is doing. She can be taking our four grandchildren to the movies, or just lying in bed until noon watching TV, and she is similarly content. I can pop up out of nowhere with an idea for us to run off to a store to buy something we need (!) for the house, and she’ll quickly and easily drop whatever she’s doing and merrily tag along.

Wow! To be that flexible, accommodating, and emotionally stable. What a gift.

I think the lesson here is not to try to “fix” ourselves or try too hard to be something we likely will never be. Maybe the best approach is to just value ourselves for whatever good qualities we have, and value others for the ones they possess. It’s a potpourri of people and qualities and skills in this big, crazy world. If we just focus on fully utilizing our own particular strengths and allow others to fully express theirs, things should work out pretty well. Certainly, we will all be more content with ourselves, providing each of us with some measure of peacefulness.

About the Author ()

TIM MCINTYRE retired in 2004 from his position as president of Applied Systems after facilitating a successful sale of the company. At only forty-six years old, he made the unusual decision to fully retire to pursue other interests and simply enjoy free time. As a hard-driving Type A personality, this turned out to be a significant challenge for the Notre Dame and University of Chicago-educated MBA, CPA, and Certified Cash Manager.

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