Be a Gentleman

Filed in Living by on August 11, 2016 4 Comments


Being a gentleman is becoming a lost art. Whether it is the millennial “hook up” dating culture or simply the laziness of the modern male, it seems few men observe the rules of gentlemanliness.

For those men who think being a gentleman is unnecessary because men and women are the same, I ask you to consider how non-threatening it is for a male to jog alone on a nature trail or go out to their car in the mall parking lot at night, and how women feel about these same activities.

Also, a gentleman opens doors, pulls out chairs, and carries things not because his wife or girlfriend is helpless or unable, but because he wants to show her she is valuable and worthy of respect.

So what are the various ways to act a gentleman? Here is a sampling of ones I favor:

  • When entering or exiting a building, open the door for her.
  • When a hostess is guiding you to your table at a restaurant, let your significant other walk ahead of you, and then pull out her chair for her to sit down.
  • When ordering in a restaurant, always allow her to order first.
  • On your first date, insist on paying the bill, unless possibly if she asked you out.
  • A gentleman helps a lady put on her coat.
  • You can choose to always open the car door for her, but this might be more than is necessary considering our busy lives. Doing so on special occasions, however, is still the mark of a gentleman.
  • It might seem counterintuitive, but a gentleman is expected to enter and leave an elevator before a lady does, to make sure no one untoward lurks on the other side.
  • When walking on the sidewalk of a busy street, walk on the curb side so she is more out of harm’s way.
  • Dropping her off in front of a restaurant, and then parking the car and walking to the entrance, is a nice touch on a special occasion, especially if she is wearing high heels.
  • Filling her car with gas and getting it washed when it requires it is a kind gesture.
  • A dozen red roses are a very gentlemanly way to express your undying love for her, any day of the year!

                                          The world is full of guys. Be a man.

From the movie Say Anything

About the Author ()

TIM MCINTYRE retired in 2004 from his position as president of Applied Systems after facilitating a successful sale of the company. At only forty-six years old, he made the unusual decision to fully retire to pursue other interests and simply enjoy free time. As a hard-driving Type A personality, this turned out to be a significant challenge for the Notre Dame and University of Chicago-educated MBA, CPA, and Certified Cash Manager.

Comments (4)

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  1. Chris Lampione says:

    Well put. Sometimes (not an excuse) we need a reminder to treat women with care, love & respect.

  2. Colleen says:

    Hi Tim…. I agree 100%!! All this shows beautiful respect for the woman and the man is clearly a class act that was raised well. I love it!!

  3. Bill Quick says:

    Hi Timmy, I have always done most of these things. I’m old school I guess. But looking at this list I learned a new one so that’s great. I agree though, not to bash the younger guys but I’m not sure they think of respecting women as part of being a strong man.

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